What is Self Sabotage?

Self-sabotage is when you undermine your own efforts and goals through actions or inactions that hinder your progress. It’s a pattern of behaviors or attitudes that ultimately prevent you from achieving what you want, despite your best intentions.

Examples of Self-Sabotage:

  • Procrastination: Putting off tasks that are crucial for your success.

  • Perfectionism: Setting unrealistically high standards that lead to chronic dissatisfaction and avoidance.

  • Negative Self-Talk: Doubting your abilities and reinforcing beliefs that you’re not good enough.

  • Self-Destructive Habits: Engaging in behaviors that harm your well-being, like impulsive spending or excessive drinking.

Why Does Self-Sabotage Happen?

  • Fear of Failure: You might sabotage your efforts to avoid the risk of failing.

  • Fear of Success: Success can bring its own set of pressures and expectations, causing discomfort and self-sabotage.

  • Low Self-Esteem: If you don’t believe you deserve success, you might unconsciously undermine your own efforts.

  • Unresolved Trauma: Past experiences or unresolved emotional issues can influence current behaviors and decisions.

How to Stop Self-Sabotaging:

  • Acknowledge the Patterns: Recognize when and how you’re sabotaging yourself. Self-awareness is the first step towards change.

  • Set Realistic Goals: Break down big goals into smaller, manageable tasks to reduce overwhelm and build confidence.

  • Challenge Negative Thoughts: Replace self-doubt with neutral or positive mantras. Remind yourself of your strengths.

  • Practice Self-Compassion: Be kind to yourself when you make mistakes and focus on learning and growth rather than self-criticism.

  • Seek Support: Talk to a therapist who can provide guidance and accountability in overcoming these patterns.

If you are interested in unpacking your own patterns of self-sabotage, reach out to me at eada@morningbirdtherapy.com!

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